Soccer Coaching Blog | Professional Soccer Coaching Advice


My 12-point plan to dealing with troublesome parents

dave clarke

There will be times as a coach when you have trouble dealing with parents.

Parents are one of your main support links with the team and you rely on them for lots of things – mainly getting their child to training or matches. However, your biggest supporter could become your biggest problem if they feel aggrieved by the way their child has been handled.

This can result in problems in the coach-player relationship

A cross parent can be difficult to get through to because when dealing with their child logic or reason goes out of the window. This can be very stressful for coaches, and in some instances could threaten their job with the team.

Here is my blueprint to dealing with parents.

  1. Arrange a meeting rather than have a stand up argument at the side of the pitch.
  2. Hold the meeting in private but have another coach or some other person present.
  3. Do some digging and find out if the parent has previous history of aggressive or unreasonable behaviour.
  4. What does the problem revolve around? Playing time/Not starting games/Upset by coach. You could put together a plan of how to resolve this but if the parent is being unreasonable don’t agree to something that means other players will suffer – time on the pitch for example.
  5. Give parents time to get their point across without interruptions.
  6. Give your point of view but don’t give too much information than is necessary and don’t discuss other players.
  7. If possible, document the facts or details of the parent’s complaint. Determine whether any and all supportive information will be available at the meeting.
  8. When meeting with the parent, always have another person sit in on the meeting, perhaps the AD, assistant principal, or another coach–someone to verify what actually takes place.
  9. Meeting alone with the parent can develop into a no-win scenario.
  10. At the meeting, allow the parent to vent his or her spleen. Make mental notes, but do not interrupt.
  11. Avoid attacking the parents over the reasons they may be attacking you.
  12. If parents start being rude or shouting at you stay calm and let them calm down
  13. Go over the meeting in your mind and action any points you have agreed with the parents. What could you have done better? How could you have made it easier for yourself?

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2 Comments so far
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These are all good guidelines. A couple of additional points…..make sure the ground rules are VERY CLEAR by having a parent meeting at the beginning of the season. Perhaps the player cannot play if parents do not attend? Expectations on parent behaviour – to coaches, refs, and players, including their own – should be a big part, and rules for playing time as well.

have fun!
markb

Comment by Mark B

merci dans le but de cette nouvelle, un l’histoire de papier bon complet et pour finir super.

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